Reminds Me of My Own Trouble In Mind
I’ve been listening to Hayes Carll’s latest album, Trouble in Mind, nonstop since I bought it a couple of weeks ago. It’s funny how certain music draws you in — like you’ve always loved it, like you’ve somehow lived it or have always known. I feel this way about “Beaumont.”
I can see myself sitting in a bar in Florida where they played guitar too loud. It was New Year’s Eve 2001. There was lots of commotion — people laughing, cheering, drinking, getting ready to toast the exciting New Year, champagne glass in hand, everyone two sheets to the wind. I was sitting by myself and wondering why I was even there. I wished I hadn’t come. I knew my so-called relationship wasn’t real and knew it wouldn’t last.
I’ve never been to Beaumont, Texas. I’ve never been to that bar on Murphy and I sure can’t remember the last time I drank whiskey. But really, it doesn’t matter. Maybe that’s why I love this song so much — I can feel it nonetheless. I know what it’s like to lean on a memory, with my back turned to the crowd and to know my relationship is going nowhere. If I only I had had his words that night, maybe I could have saved myself the trouble: “I could not wait forever babe, I hope you understand.”